Retreat

So we're back from our retreat, and I'm back to work now. Today's going to be crazy-busy with HOPE Program and meetings and such, but that's all right by me.

Here are my favorite lines I heard from people over the weekend:

"I have to go to the little nun's room."
--Sr. Marilyn

"If it weren't for women, I don't even think we'd have society. We'd probably still be running around clubbing things."
--Michael Corlew

"You have the monopoly on being right."
--Emi Elepano

"It doesn't matter if they don't even listen. You have an obligation to speak."
--G'Kar

And, okay, G'Kar isn't actually a real person. He isn't even actually a fake person. He's a fake alien on the Babylon 5 television series. But it's a good line nonetheless, I think.

On to other topics, I discovered this weekend that I just don't feel the 'Praise God' variety of prayer. During my short stint on this Earth, I've prayed in a lot of different ways and I've experienced a lot of different things, and currently, I tend toward a more practical brand of spirituality. For instance, Jesus said to feed the poor. The answer is not, "Praise Jesus," the answer is to go and feed the poor. Words without action don't mean so much to me right now. It was a good weekend for self-discovery, I think, but not exactly in the way intended. We had service volunteers from three groups at the retreat house, all of us doing social justice work for the poor and marginalized. And keeping in mind the group that we had there, sitting around singing worship songs just left me wanting.

Don't get me wrong--I'm not against prayer itself or anything, I just want something deeper. I want to question and discern and apply spirituality to the everyday injustices that we are faced with. One of my boys has two gangs after him right now. So yes, it's nice to say that God is Great, but you have to admit that the world is full of people who are messing things up, and we've kind of got to do something about that. And if there is nothing I can do about a particular situation, I need more in my prayer than simple words that say nice things, but explain nothing. They worked for me when I was younger, but I've seen an awful lot more of life since then, and it just doesn't work for me anymore.

So yes, it was a good weekend for discovering things about myself. I also talked a lot with Emi, who was just in Jamaica and who had a conflict with one of his superiors quite similar to the one I've been having with one of mine. And he offered me a great new insight into conflict resolution. And also, we went to the Body Exhibit at the Museum of Science and Industry, and I learned a lot about the way my body works, and I really can't wait to go back when Elizabeth and Winn come to visit because it's an awful lot to absorb. And also, one of my girls loaned me All Quiet On The Western Front, and I am disgusted once again with the unjust system of war, where the people making the decisions are not the ones carrying them out and suffering for them. There is more I need to understand, about a lot of things I guess. I'm 25, so hopefully I've got a good 50 more years or so to figure out some things.